Dating, sex, and relationships all encompass a degree of uncertainty. Whom should I date? Why am I dating this person? How far should we go physically? Should we take things to the next level? These questions and more are generally in your mind from the start of a relationship. How can you answer those questions for yourself? To start, you can determine what type of person you want to marry and decide that you are not going to get an STD or get pregnant before marriage. By determining those two things, other answers become much easier. For instance:
Q. Whom should I date?
A. A person with the same values, goals, and beliefs as me
Q. Why am I dating this person?
A. To get to know this person and decide if this is the type of person I want to marry
Q. How far should we go physically?
A. We cannot have sex due to the risk of pregnancy, and we cannot have oral or anal sex because of the risk of STD. Anything that leads to having sex should be avoided (taking off clothes, touching personal areas, etc.).
Q. Should we take things to the next level?
A. By taking this relationship to the “next level,” I am putting myself at risk. If this person loves me, they won’t risk getting pregnant or giving me an STD. If you love me, marriage is the only “next level” that we need.
No, dating is not a black and white area. However, you can set your own standards, and those standards will protect you from numerous problems. If you would like help setting standards, please come speak with a peer counselor at the Pregnancy Center.